May 3, 2004

  Hey
   
    Saturday night, I made a return trip to Social and quickly began to wonder why I ever stopped going
there. Social is the West Side's answer to Metro 53 and Manhattan's answer to Rory Dolan's. There must
have been a private party somewhere there Saturday night, because I didn't hear one Britney Spears, 50-
Cent or any other gangsta song in the 2 hours. They hired a hot new bartender named Jonelle who is very
nice as well as stunningly beautiful, and for you ladies out there, Alan is still the man on the first floor.
    I was only going to stay for an hour or so, but stayed till close to closing time. There were cop cars all
up and down 8th Avenue, so I figured they would close promptly at 4.

NEWS
    I have all the respect in the world for John Kerry's service in Vietnam. Especially since as a college
graduate, he didn't have to go. He could have entered politics right there, gone to law school or joined
the Texas Air National Guard.
    His bravery during combat and the fact that he was injured, make him a hero in my book. And I have
no problem with him coming home and saying the war was wrong. Hell, he was there, he has that right.
    But I have a problem with him tossing medals at the Capitol. Supposedly there weren't his or they were
his ribbons and someone else's medals, or they were all someone else's. It doesn't matter.
    I know, people laugh at me because I have such a hang-up with American flags and medals and stuff,
but good people put their lives on the line for those medals.  There had to be a better way for him to
protest. Like how he went before Congress in 1971. That had more effect on the antiwar movement than
tossing a medal.

    Last week, a girl from New Jersey was arrested because she was selling pot in her dorm room at
NYU's Hayden Hall. I spent many a night at Hayden, I was on a first name basis with the security guards
there. I can safely say that busting someone for selling grass at Hayden is like arresting someone for
scalping tickets outside Yankee Stadium. Talk about shooting fish in a barrel.
 
     If you look at the evidence and the testimony about the night Jayson Williams shot limo driver Gus
Christofi, it pretty much sums up Jayson Williams, who at once could be one of the most charming and
generous people on earth and an out of control maniac at the same time.
    Yes, he was out of control and maniacal when he was twirling a loaded shotgun around. The fact that
he had all those guns to me confirms that he's nuts. I'm no gun-control freak, the Constitution says you
can own a gun, but how many do you need?
    But as Phil Mushnick once pointed out, how many big shot celebrities would take the time out to say
to the poor guy who was driving him and his drunken buddies around and say "Hey why don't you park
the limo and come hang out inside with us for a bit. I'll give you a tour of the mansion." Most guys would
let the limo driver sit outside in the car all night.
    Of course Christofi would have been better off staying put, but therein lay the complex character that
is Jayson Williams.

SPORTS

    Lets put this hitless at-bats streak by Derek Jeter in perspective. This was the longest hitless streak by
a Yankee since 1977. Now the Yankees didn't win a World Series between 1978 and 1996, and while they
had some great players in those dry years, they also had some pretty crappy ones too. My God, in
1990, they lost 95 games. You mean to tell me that no Yankee on those horrible teams ever went hitless
so long?
    And although he got a rousing ovation when he finally got a hit, he did get booed pretty badly. Made
me chuckle when I thought back to how Yankee fans said they'd be supportive of Armando Benitez when
he became a Yankee no matter how many saves he blew. Unlike us fair-weather Met fans. This from the
same people who booed Mickey Mantle when he was at the end.
    And speaking of my hitless, bullpenless wonders, did you know that the Mets starting rotation had the
second lowest ERA in the National League? But because they can't hit, and they have no relief pitching,
they are near the bottom of the standings.

    The only news from my job is that we have two new employees, both of whom I helped train. A guy
and a girl. The guy forgets to write down his shifts and according to other workers "doesn't do anything"
The girl, keeps calling me "mother duckling" because I told her to "follow me" when we were giving out
copies. She's made other smartass comments at my expense and even said something to the Metro
Editor just out of his earshot. I'm tempted to tell her that she should tell our editor in chief what a stupid
idea the Yankee Medallion thing was "Because he likes it when office staff offers suggestions" Am I that
cruel?
Maybe

NBC aired a TV movie about an earthquake measuring 10.5 on the Richter scale hitting the West Coast.
Amongst the visual effects were the Golden Gate Bridge collapsing and the Hollywood sign falling letter
by letter.
     I didn't tune in, I just saw the commercial. I guess even after 2 1/2 years, the memory of standing on
Madison Avenue, discussing with my co-workers which landmarks to avoid just in case another plane
crashed is still pretty fresh. Maybe I need to move on. Whatever. Anyway I have a feeling whatever
schmuck came up with this idea wasn't in New York City on 9/11/2001.
   And while we're on the subject, I know some of you are big fans of the Fox Series 24, (and please note
I'm writing this while I'm in FOX headquarters) but I'm also not really keen on watching a show that has
terrorists using biological weapons to a) Kill the President and b) wipe out a major city. Those shows
were fun when I didn't think it could happen.
Now, they're not so much fun.
Before I step down from my soapbox, Happy Birthday to Weekly Mail's favorite opera singer Anne
(Sunday) Also for Sunday, Happy Mother's Day to all to whom it applies.

Everyone Else Have a Great Week
Wild B.